hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
