you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
