i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
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