Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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