Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
