We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
