so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
