People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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