Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you

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(973): View more from New Jersey

He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could

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(518): View more from New York

you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"

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(250): View more from British Columbia

My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.

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(812): View more from Indiana

according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep

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(628): View more from California

That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.

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