"it" just moved
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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