every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
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