Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
