how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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