We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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