last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Randomize
