idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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