No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
