I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
