he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Randomize
