I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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