thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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