He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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