Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
