this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
love makes seman taste better
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
