I hate your face
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
