I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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