When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
