The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
