Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize