i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
