Where did you get a picture of my penis
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
