She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
