Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Randomize