In the future we'll all be gay
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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