So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
please don't ironically join a cult
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