it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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