ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
