i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Randomize
