i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize