The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Randomize
