omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
