Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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