We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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