No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize