his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
