It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
We are two peas in an std pod
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
