Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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