Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
