dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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