so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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