i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
